Go Away Bear! (Gearing Up - Part 2)

"Hey Bill!....You up for some of that bear work you wanted to do?"

"You bet I am! You need me to get my 'chute?"

"No… I don't think that'll be necessary but we will need to gather a few things."

"You do know that I used to ju..."

"Yeah...I know Bill, I know."

***************

Truth be told I was quite glad to have Bill around at that time. I was just given my first "bear" assignment in the National Park and my job was quite literally to act as "bait" to see if an aggressive bear was still hanging around one of the back country campsites.

As I was contemplating the task at hand, in the back of my mind, I couldn't help but think about that wise old adage, "If you ever get chased by a bear, you don't have to out run the bear…you just have to out run the slowest person there." I have no doubt that Bill, in his highly-conditioned military state, was much faster and more nimble than me, but then again I had no qualms about tripping people. After all he wasn't really a part of the family, at least not yet, so people couldn't get too mad at me...could they? Anyway, I was comforted by the fact that brains always out match braun and for that simple reason I was feeling a lot better about this trip.

I began to gather the meager camping supplies I had collected over the years. Unfortunately, salaries for budding wildlife biologists are what some might call scant to non-existent so side item toys and luxuries weren't a high priority thus far in my life. There are things much more important to a young naïve twenty-something year old...like bread and milk and of course, beer. As you could imagine, earning just over $100 a week, my trips to REI and Cabelas were about as frequent as Haley's comet. Actually I shouldn't say that since Haley's comet did come around once when I was eight years old and I had yet to step foot in either store. 

The tiny pile of camping gear I had gathered wasn't nearly as depressing as I thought it would be. In fact, I was actually quite pleased at the cute little mound...a few worn out sleeping bags, some half-rusted cooking utensils, a couple of flashlights, some rope, and an old tattered red backpack. What more could a man destined for the woods ask for? The only thing I was truly lacking was a tent.

Dadgummit...that was a rather important detail.

Oh well...off to Wally World we went! (I didn't even consider the other two camping stores since all the extra moolah I had laying around totaled a mere $17 and whatever change was buried deep in the ashtray of my Jeep. REI and Cabelas would just have to wait!)

An hour later my hopes were almost squashed at Wally World. Much to my chagrin, the nice spacious, made in Hong Kong, four-man tents sold for a whopping $24.99, an easy seven dollars more than I had to my name (I only found 38 cents in the dadgum ashtray!). Think Daryl, think!

The toy section!

Picture if you will a child's play tent very much like you would imagine in a cartoon. 

It was gorgeous...bright green, A-frame, two wooden poles to hold up the peak on each end, and four plastic stakes to hold down the corners. I am sure if Bill and I stretched completely out, our heads and our feet would stick out equally on both ends. At least death from a bear will come quickly.

Now back to the house to finish packing for daylight was burning.

Upon arriving back home I was greeted by a National Park Service truck idling in my driveway. Mr. Stiver (aka Bill, but a good Bill) had stopped by to pick something up from the bear center and to wish me well. (Note to self: If asked to do some "bear work" and a seasoned veteran of such work stops by to "wish you well"... just go fishing instead.)

Now that I think about, Mr. Stiver's opening question to me didn't really boost my confidence that afternoon. I can still hear his words as if it were only yesterday…

"So Kim is REALLY sending you up to campsite #10?"

"Ummm...yeah....is there somethin' I should know?"

"Well considering the bear was getting into people's tents while they were sleeping, I'm surprised he's sending you up so soon. He was actually pretty aggressive, even grabbed a guy by the boot. Anyway...hope you have a good tent."

"Yep...brand spanking new!" I said, with a bead of sweat trickling down my temple. "Is there anything else I should know about...or do while I'm up there? ...besides not get eaten?" I said, with a forced laugh.

"Well, I'm sure Kim wants you to simulate a real camping experience so it would be good to cook up a meal and get some aromas floatin' in the air. If the bear is still in the area he'll be sure to come in. Other than that...be careful!"

"Thank you sir. I appreciate the info AND the dutiful warning."

"Oh...and don't forget your pepper spray!"

And with that Mr. Stiver hopped in his truck and was off.

***********************

By this time, it was now approaching 5:00 p.m. This meant there was less than four hours left of daylight and we still had to drive to the trailhead and hike up to the campsite...an easy three-hour endeavor.

With added urgency, Bill and I finished loading the gear, bid our women farewell and hopped in the jeep for our first, and hopefully not last, bear adventure. If all went well we would have about an hour of daylight left to set up camp.

But when does everything ever go as planned?

(To Be Continued...)